update. what i do best every few months

   

                                       

 Clearly maintaining this blog is not my strong suit, which i really need to be better at especially if i want to be apart of the cool Mormon newly-wed bloggers group. JK. But anyway's so far in our life it has been going really well (aside from my constant plague lingering over me - no joke I have been sick for a solid month and two weeks before that in March). 

*pictured above are just a few pictures from when were in California and our birthday's and family time. 

So Trevor and I have been doing really great lately, so I'm going to back up the train to preface why it's been  good few weeks. For the last year, or our first year of marriage; we seemed to have been in this rut we didn't quite know we were in. Trevor had started at the U, I had started a new job and everything seemed to be going really well. He was starting his Mechanical Engineering degree and I was finishing up at the BC and we were a fresh set of newly wed's so it seemed to be a given that we would have our up's and down's and what not. Not to say marriage was hard but more of the situation we found ourselves in and time and time again which was school. The first semester proved to be harder than we had anticipated, we knew it would be an adjustment so we just carried on. Then the next semester no different, it was as it we were on a runway just waiting to catch speed and take off. I had revisited Trevor's choice for a career and while me being the anxiety ridden person I am, I felt so strongly that the ME program wasn't the best, but I had doubted myself and knowing that Trevor felt it was what he would do, I just felt so unsure and that we needed to revisit our plan of action. We tried our best to do what we could and just keep going and pray that it would all end well. By the third semester, I had nudged Trevor in the beginning to really think about his choice, because while we are a pair in this decision, it is his choice and I'm here to support. I also urged him to reevaluate the job situation he was in, he worked at the JSMB for three years and they offered good hours but b a month in to his semester he was working overtime and weekends which was not the original plan. So I told him with my income we were ok for him to quit and just solely focus on school and so he quit and it was great! So I gently advised him to think about the options with school. Then about half way through his buddy had mentioned that the coding class Trevor had suggested he take to see if he would enjoy the computer side of things turned out to be his favorite class, Trevor decided to look into Information Systems. Around this time my brother was looking for someone to be a data entry guy for his company he is working to build up. I told Trevor it would be perfect because it was minimal hours and pretty mundane work which is probably the ideal work for a full-time student. 

Now during this time I was on my death bed and we were sleeping in our living room (hah). He had been up all night thinking about this and researching and by 6 am, me seeing that at 12 am and 3 am that Trevor was glued to his phone, I turn over to see him wide eye looking at me and saying "I'm changing my program and I know it's the right one". So as a precursor, I had applied to a new job that had literally fallen into my lap and was still at the U which allowed me to give Trevor the coveted half tuition and keep our lovely benefits. So as we were praying it would all work out. As we talked throughout the day, and I thought about it more and more, I knew that this suited Trevor and was so baffled as to how we missed all the signs that he really enjoyed computers. There it was the burden that was weighing on our shoulders had been lifted and we never knew. On my birthday, I went in for my third and final interview, which was just a get to know you and this is our company type thing, I submitted my two weeks and finally it seemed that all was right with our life. We were thrilled that Trevor was in a degree that would allow him to graduate with his Master's one semester shy of what the Mechanical Engineering would give him with a Bachelor's, it was just so much better. As I mentioned before about that job with my brother, it worked out and Trevor started on Friday and really likes it for what it is. 

Looking back at the start of our marriage and where we were to now, it was a like a light had been shed but it was great learning curve for us. Trevor learned that he needs to trust me a bit more and I need to let him decide on his own, so a little give on both sides will do us good. 

For the sake of my prosperity and the fact that I want to be 50 and have a shred of memory of our younger years, I vow to update this more regularly.

1 year

Trevor and I have been married for 1 whole year. It's been a good year, looking back. We've loved every day and it's been tough some days but rewarding. Being married to Trevor is a breeze, he's such a nice guy it's hard not to love him. 

As the day went, we woke up and strolled on over to Einsteins Bagels and devoured warm, toasted bagels. Talking about what we were doing at that moment, that time last year which is totally ridiculous, just warp us back to High School everyone.

As a precursor, the night before (which I so cleverly planned) asked Trevor if he would like to go to the driving range, as tears surfaced.. not really but he was beaming and smiling like we he had just won The Master's. So mid morning the next day we made our way to Eaglewood Golf Course and I swear I should've had a leash, he was like that dog that gets to the dog park and can barely control himself. I was practically speed walking to keep up. Trevor has been so patiently asking me to go golfing for the full year of our married selves. So to say the least, he was happy. Thanks to my genes I'm not too bad at golf, and I had golfed right handed, which I'm convinced I'm a lefty but you know... I'm amphibious (as quoted by Charles Shackleford). To my surprise, I thoroughly enjoyed myself. Best stress reliever ever. It was like all my worry and anger and stress just flew away with the ball. So I have no problem with Trevor sharing his love of golf with me. I think I like it because it's a perfecting game, and it's individual. So win-win on that one. wahoo! 

Then we lounged for the day because I wasn't feeling all that great and made our way over to Sawadee Thai Restaurant for dinner, and it was delicious. I love thai and all it offers. It was a first for us to go to that place and it was money well spent. We were drooling over our sweet sticky mango rice, afterwards Trevor and I couldn't stop dreaming about it.

Then to top off the night we went and saw the highly recommended Cinderella and it was a dream! It was so beautiful, the costumes, the message. Trevor and I aren't normally one's for Disney type movies, but I can watch one and be good to go for a few years. But this was great and so well done, I would definitely see this one again. It was lovely. 

After 1 year I have seen a side of Trevor that I didn't see before, and then parts that fell together. Not being much a people person, it's nice to look forward to someone at the end of every day. He gets me, and I get him.

It's amazing how marriage works.

Marriage is beautiful / fun / sweet / hilarious / safe / enjoyable / hard / rewarding. 

So to my love, here's to many more years. 

                                                 

live and let live

It's been a long January / February over here. Thankfully it hasn't snowed or I think I might have just gone into a dark, deep sad state of mind. I'm not OK with snow; never have been and probably never will be. So having a very mild winter was just perfect. We've been in the rut of work / school / study or study / school / work. There's days that I felt I haven't had down time and been able to rest without closing my eyes and I'm back at square one for the day. There's also been days where I feel it's been a good solid week where I haven't really talked to Trevor, where we've just been in the mentality of "go! go! go!" So when those days of {let's be real} "I'm going to do nothing" comes around you better believe I'm full blown comfy and reluctant to move from one solid state of being. Where we'll eat bowls of cereal for our meals. This is a great time of our lives it's a good time in our lives, it's also stressful. I believe there are different types of stress for different stages of our life and right now we're both thinking can time just fast forward about 3 years? Don't get me wrong or as a "woe is my life" kind of person right now. This is my happy place, my safe place, my place to vent, my comfort zone, my little sanctuary to feel what I feel and write it down. I feel as if I am in a hamster wheel or entering a marathon that's running a track that won't stop. Like I've started at just a place that I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing or how my legs will carry me to the finish line. Sometimes I get so overwhelmed that I honestly just need to hibernate and just not talk to anyone. It's in those moments that I humble myself and think "this is not you. You don't let petty things bother you". I muster up the strength to keep running, to keep pushing myself to stay positive and keep moving towards the goals I've set for myself and with Trevor. I think that sometimes people that are married as young as we are want to skip to the next phase in a blink of an eye. Because honestly, this part is stressful, you are just getting your feet on the ground as a married couple, trying not to drown in school, and to figure out how you will pay for a life that'll include little babes for the next 40 years. I mean holy cow, I look at it in a naive perspective sometimes and think that it'll all work out and not to stress the little things, but that simply is just not me. I am as real as it gets, I see black and white and sometimes the grey, and that is a stressful way to see things sometimes (just ask Trevor, he's calming me down about 90% of the time). But I realize that I've always had this frame of mind that I need to look at life in the aspect that its not all roses and that sometimes people are mean, and that I need to relax and not take things so personally, but you can't help it sometimes, it's what makes you you. I'm glad I'm that way because sometimes Trevor is on another planet and I need to drag him back to reality and sometimes I'm on that same planet imagining who knows what. It's what makes us work well together. 

Speaking of Trevor, this guy doesn't know what mean is. I think it's incomprehensible to him. The definition just doesn't flow through that guy's head. {he did tell me a sad thing he did to a baby egg when he was six and I think that action changed his course of action in life} He's got a kind heart and strong will to succeed. He's got looks to kill and a personality that will make you laugh. He's effortless and fresh. He's smart and hard-working. He's got an imagination I never had and he's got a helpless way about him {which makes us chime together perfectly}. We pick up where the other faulters. 

With that said, I feel that sometimes it's hard for people to grasp the idea that I am married at 20, that I'm completely clueless in my educational pursuits, and that I've accomplished this while fooling them for a 23 year old. I let this little statement get the best of me. It's left me completely speechless and questioning my worth as a person- that if what I'm doing really is the best thing I'm doing for my life because who knows "your husband could die at any random point in life and be ill prepared"- a real person has told me this. But honestly that's no way to live your life. So I follow T. Swift's mantra and shake it off. Because I can turn the other cheek and move on. So I do and I continue having people believe me for a 23 year old, and that's OK.  So what if I don't get my bachelors, I mean let's get real people. Pursuing education and knowledge can come in many aspects and I think that's what I might do. I can't tell you in what or how but I can tell you that I want to develop skills that will benefit me and my family, skills that I can use through out life,  I would love to hold a diploma that grants me a right of passage to an open door of opportunity. But I just don't see that door for me, I see other doors that lead to other doors of things that I can learn and grow in in my own way and feel just as accomplished. So that's what I'll do, it'll take a life time of dedication to develop whatever skills that interest me but I think it's a better suited route for me and Trevor. Also, that level of stress for both of us to get a degree would probably not do so well for our marriage, Trevor needs me as a wife and a cheerleader and so I will do exactly that. 

Live and let live.

I just needed to write this down so I wouldn't dwell on it any longer. This is my trail right now, among other things and I think the best thing for me is to just write it out and let it go.

Sorry for this boring blog post about my thoughts. I'll post something more exciting in the next few weeks {our 1 year is coming around corner!}

we go together like a wink and smile

Let's take it back 2 years from our first Valentine's day and probably the most eventful year and progress from there: 

To the endearing RM,

I can't believe it's been 2 whole years since our first little Valentine's day together. Snap, that was so long ago and I remember clear as day and how awkward we both were which totally cracks me up because let's be honest you had no idea what you were getting yourself into. You picked me up, flowers in hand. They were daisy's of different colors and they were lovely. We wen't to the Cheese Cake Factory (because I've been there once) and then after we strolled around SLC together, hand in hand, and through Memory Grove and up to the Capital. It was lovely and I think afterwards we watch 500 Day's of Summer and ate the chocolates you had given me. I had given you a pun intended Ghirardelli chocolate bar, and a little poem I worked so hard on. It was nothing short of anything, it was a good first Valentine's day. I was not (and still am not) one to openly show my affection and what stuck with me from that first Valentine's was that is was purely friends. We had been friends for 3 1/2 months we got to know each other, this was nothing different or overly romantic in the eyes of others. Regardless, that's what made it so great. You were purely a friend and you continue to be and I grew to love you. I didn't fall in love (because that's a cliche) I grew to love you; and you for you. I knew from the beginning you would be dearest friend, you were so sweet and charming. You were the type that could hardly say no and I could see an indescribable way about you that was so intriguing, I still can't put into words those first few months of getting to know you; you were by far the nicest guy to ever have walked into my life. I had shied away from that because I failed to see that as a trait. But none-the-less, you are still that same way today, one I have learned so much from. 

To my fiance,

Here we are another Valentine's Day. Just another casual dinner date and walk around the Capital with some delicious frozen yogurt to follow. This time around it was much different I was completely content on how things were going, we had a little pause in our relationship much to my surprise with a necklace that would send my indecisive Moffat genes running. But all was good a month later and it was as if that had never happened, because I think we both just mentally did not want to relive that time in our life hah. We went to Star of India because Indian food is on my top ten favorite foods. Anywho, I think we discussed pressing topics such as, how you won't have to drop me off and we can be in our own place sans roommates, what colors for the wedding, honeymooning, your suit, my dress, the future 6 months, and whatever rambling things we were thinking in that moment. I think we also went to City Creek to people watch because people are straight up strange. You were so good to me, I could tell in that I had you head-over-heels in love with me; as soon as I was set on marrying you, your lonely self transitioned into the endearing guy I know. I could see that that time apart was good for us and where we were in our current state of mind, it was all meant to be, the timing of it all. We compliment each other and I am glad to call you mine. 

To my husband, 
How things have shaped and evolved. We are sitting in our apartment, married. Sometimes I can't believe were married! It's so crazy how in two short years we met, dated, got engaged and married. All because it felt right and it was, it was perfect but it's crazy to think that we both feel like we've just been friends forever. I totally believe we knew each other before and just found each other here. this Valentine's was nothing out of the ordinary. Some donuts, home decor shopping, and take out Thai food, mixed with a ton and I mean a ridiculous amounts of chocolate. I came home on Friday to beautiful tulips, a giant heart filled with assorted chocolates, and my favorite cookie/biscuits. I'm glad your my person and I'm your person. We fit together perfectly, we compliment each other; everything works in tandem when we're together, it's a wonderful thing. Marriage has been rough at times but it's always sweet. It's lovely. You're lovely. You help me to be happy when it's hard, you care for me and strive to make me happy in everything. It's probably the young love vibe of marriage but I hope it continues and I'm sure it will. You make me laugh and I feel I can be my complete self. Everyone needs to be reminded of how wonderful they are to those in their life, and you are everything to me. My favorite person.

So let's finish Sleepless In Seattle and shove our faces with chocolates and martinelli's.
MFEO you and me